Journey to Parenthood

It's a rainy and cool Sunday morning, and I am curled up in my husband's sweatshirt with a warm cup of Joe.  We got to spend the whole morning together just the two of us, and even slept in today--a rare occasion in our home.  Well rested, and filled with joy, I have the heart to write to you today.

Mother's Day has come and gone, again.  The third one since we began to understand our faced limitations to becoming parents.  Last year, I remember walking out of church, unable to sit through the service, where mothers were recognized and sweet sounds of babies filled the room. "Why not us?" I asked bitterly.

So much growth has occurred over the last year(s).  After invasive tests and blood work, awkward questions from our doctors, and the tears shed in the car on the way home as we held on tight to each other's hands...we are now here in this happy and peaceful place, knowing that soon enough we will become parents.

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Nicholas and I met in college.  We bonded over common friendships, and common dreams.  Nicholas came from a huge family with close ties; he wanted nothing more in life than to become a father at a young age.  At first, this desire to be such a young daddy scared me a little; I grew up in a home witnessing devastating brokenness, and feared the inability to serve a child properly, doubting my ability to be a young mother.

But, a late night conversation revealed our hearts at a young 19 years of age.

We had this game we played.  We'd sit on opposite ends of the couch, and ask questions for hours on end, getting to know one another, and diving deep beyond the surface of most teenage relationships.



"What's your greatest fear in life...." I'd ask
"To not be able to have my own children...", he replied.

Quickly steering the conversation an anticipated different direction, Nicholas asked,
"Tell me about one of your dreams for the future..."


"To adopt a baby", I proudly stated.


I will never know how I knew at such an early age that I wanted to adopt.  And truth be told, 19 years old was 10 years after the desire had been placed on my heart.  How great is our God to prepare us for the endeavors He has in store for us later in life?  My eyes are filled with tears, when I look back and see the inner workings of our Creator, who so gently and patiently guided us to the amazing plan He has in store for us. From our decision to begin trying to become parents much sooner than we ever thought we would, to our decision to see an infertility specialist, to various phone calls with adoption agencies, we have been brought here to this day in May of 2014.

Today, I can announce with great pride, alongside our supportive family and friends, that we are adopting our first child.  We have such an enormous amount of love to share with children.  Children, in our eyes, are the light of this world.  To us, there is no greater gift than to love your spouse so much, that you can confidently bring a child in to your home, sharing with them your love, faith, knowledge, and skills. 

This journey to parenthood has not been easy.  And really, it's only just beginning.  But, we have peace knowing that we are in the palm of our Creator's hands, and that there is a perfect little baby who will someday be brought by Him in to our home, to love and to cherish.

Thanks for your support, for your prayers, and for your consistent encouragement on this journey.  We know that we are not alone in this.